Alice Without

it blew me back
like a hurricane
a wind in my hair
a recognition
a peace
and thank God for it

because what wasn't
became what is
and drunkenness
won't cure everything
so I cling
and hope

that the breeze comes again
in time at least
before I fall
into the hole
like Alice without
the looking glass.

the hole

there is the hole
and I could crawl back in
dark, cozy, quiet, and
waiting
just enough room for me
and no one else.

I used to crave it
now I don't know
too much darkness
too much quiet
so they if they pull me
enough
I may just give in
I may stay out
and let the hole
be without me for awhile.

Patience

laying here
in this very spot
where she laid
where she slept
where I felt her next to me
staring at the ceiling
as found as ever
feeling something
familiar
comfortable
beautiful
knowing a
change
was made
in an instant
it wasn't
then it.
was

too soon
too soon?
the question rings
in my head
in my heart
and somewhere in my soul.
I start
stop
and start again
only to stop
for it is
too soon
and it'll wait
I will
wait.
And enjoy this time
before
when only I know
what wasn't
then what
was.